Part One: Interview Questions
Interview 4-5 people based on the following questions and post a summary of the responses: How is dating and marriage lived/experienced in your culture? At what age do you think it is appropriate to start dating? At what age should people get married?
Part Two: Weddings Around the World
Take a look at this blog post about different types of weddings and celebrations: Weddings Around the World.
Part Three: Personal Response
Respond to the following questions in 2-paragraphs based on your understanding of chapter 8 (HC): Why do anthropologists consider marriage to be universal? What are your views on monogomy, polygnmy and marriage? How does dating shape what it means to be 16?
We are Sixteen. 
Part One: Interview Questions
Shuruq
1. Parents are opposed to dating and she must marry a Muslim man.
2. Date: 18 years old
3. Marriage: 25 years old
Bora:
1. Depends on what region you’re from. Where she is from you can do anything but must marry an Albanian.
2. Date: 18- at this age relationships are not a joke, they are actually taken seriously.
3. Marriage: After college and career so you are self-independent and are ready for commitment.
Rachel:
1. High school, mature enough to really properly feel like this person is the right one. When you are younger you can’t fully appreciate it.
2. Date & Marriage: Done with school (college) and stable in life.
Jonah:
1. People gain attraction to each other. Assurance of dedication before physically sexual relationship so that they value each other.
2. Date: When their priorities are straight
3. Marriage: 26
Part 3:
Anthropologists believe marriage is universal because there are not just one race or religion ore even sex. Mainly their definition of marriage is more generally related to people rather than “a man and woman”. In most countries their are many gay marriages, interracial relationships and different religions.
Monogomy, I believe is the norm. I think it is right for someone to marry only one spouse. You have to give your full attention for the person. How is it possible to give someone your full appreciation if you have someone else, polygnmy. I think it may be kind of be dirty to share someone with another and that you have to be on time schedules to be able to spend time with your spouse. Question…is it even legal?
Dating shapes sixteen year olds because I believe this is the more experiencing stage. You have to get to know your preferences. When you become older, serious relationships are more for but depends if you are mature enough. When finally at the right age I think it s definitely time to get married. I feel when you are a certain age their is a time when you need to stop dating. I find it just a bit disturbing and that’s the American Dream. I feel it should be fulfilled by then.
Part 1:
From everyone that I interviewed, sixteen year olds will often go against the beliefs of their parents. Teens will not want to stay with what their parents believe they should marry. Teens are more interested in finding someone they genuinely love, rather than who is in their faith. When you should date is similar, it is mostly a matter of when you feel you are ready. Your teenage years are the time that you should be dating, and determining who and what you like. Marriage should occur only when you are stable, and when you want to be married.
Part 3:
Anthropologists consider marriage universal because everyone does it. In all cultures across social and cultural divisions has some kind of marriage. People all over the world have different ideas about marriage, but marriage occurs in virtually all cultures. Marriage is a union of some, which different cultures use for different things, such as economic power and religious reasons.
I feel that monogamy is essentially the “norm” when it comes to marriage. I do feel however, that human nature may not be truly “monogamous” given that cheating is so common. In this way I feel that polygamy is a reasonable alternative. It is essentially an open marriage. However, this just encourages cheating, so there is no real way to cure human urges. Perhaps marriage should actually be made ‘illegal.” Dating shapes sixteen year olds because dating is about finding your comfort zone. Often people date people similar to them in order to be comfortable. Dating is about finding where you belong, and with who.
–Love Sami
Tisa: My mom thinks that I should start dating when I am 18. My mom is really religious so she wants me to date a really good christian boy. If I bring him home he has to be kept up with the bible and stuff. You should start dating when you’re ready and not selfish anymore. You should get married when you are financially stable and stuff like like, when you are doing well for yourself.
Jonah: My dad gave me a box of condoms last month and told me “Use a rubber Joey.” You should never start dating, I don’t fux with that. Get married at at least 30 years old.
Daniel: When and male and female love each together a lot they get married they go to a church and everything and then they get married. Then afterwards they have sexual intercourse and make a baby. Then that child is annoying forever. Get married when you are 27 and start dating when you are 15.
Sammy: They want you to stay inside your religion, and like not go out of it like stay and keep it all together. STart dating when you are a teenager cause you have an idea of who you are and what you want. You should get married anytime after 18 because you are actually and adult and are more likely to be stable in all facets of your life.
Chris: In my religion you should stay in your religion and not leave it. You should start dating, whatever type of person in your religion. It’s really weird. Marriage… uhhhhh…. you should get married in your twenties because teens is too young and the time you start looking for people to, i dont know its kinda weird.
Anthropologist hold the belief that marriage is universal because in every culture pretty much that has been documented marriage has been a part of it. Many different cultures have many different views on when to marry, who to marry, and what marriage entitles. It is still in pretty much all of the cultures.
To me monogamy is the way to go, I feel like if you have a truly personal connection with someone it is not possible to feel that with multiple people. To me Polygamy is just a way for a man to be in control of multiple breeding maids. It’s not about love, and if it is than he gets to have his cake and eat it too. Marriage is something that should be solely based on your love for someone in my perspective. If you do not love someone, do not marry them. The way I truly feel though is that I am the only one who can judge my own life. Me telling a girl who has been told her whole life to marry based on monetary value to marry for love would not make sense for her. People should not tell people how to live their lives. Focus on yourself and your own happiness and not trying to tell other people what is “right” and what is “acceptable” and what is “good for them”.
Anthropologists consider marriage to be universal because its an event that occurs worldwide. People across the globe have wedding ceremonies. Some weddings take form of a competition for example the Massai warriors The idea of the game is whichever male jumps the highest is eligble to get married. Women are the judges of this competition.
Marriage should be an open oppritunity for everyone. I agree with Monogamy it shows commitment,loyalty as ell as trust between the people that are married. I disagree with Polygyny which is marriage to more than one wife, this is wrong. Its shows a lack of commitment and shouldnt be permitted anywhere. Dating shapes what it means to be 16 because its a stepping stone to adulthood. Its the first step to a relationship and what it means to be in love.
“When a male and female love each other a lot, they get married right? Yea, then they go to a church, have the ceremony and make a baby.” – Dennis
“Well, people have to marry those that are of similarity, and have their priorities in place. At least marry after 25 when you’ve matured, and wait till’ your 18 to be in a real relationship. It seems that boys just want sex when they’re teens.” -Bora
“I feel like you can date and marry those that are of similarity, and are educated. I think you should wait at least till’ your an adult to get married, and make sure you truly love that person, because being married is a huge dedication. I don’t think race or religion should matter in that situation cuz’ those don’t really mean anything.” -Raymond
“In my family, we feel that marriage should happen when your ready and you love that person. I think it takes at least a few years before you make the commitment. For dating, I think teens should date but only if they want more then just sex.”
“In my culture, most people make a dedication to one another and wait several months before they explore sexuality and introduce each other to their parents. I feel like people shouldn’t be in relationships unless they have activities and hobbies that are positive because being in a relationship can be a distraction.” -Tori
Part 1
Ashley’s culture believes that marriage is based on love and commitment and that sating is mostly accepted depending on the age. She herself believes that you should start dating during your years as a teenager. Also, she believes that it is appropriate for people to get married from their mid twenties up.
Rachel’s culture believes that you should get married when you are in love. She feels that dating should happen in your late teens and marriage is acceptable in your twenties.
Katya’s parents don’t care unless the person she is dating is abusive. She believes that people should start dating when they are emotional ready. She also believes that you should get married when you’ve been in a steady relationship for a while and it is the next step you want to take.
Jonah believes that dating and marriage occur through maturity, commitment, and love. She feels tat you should start dating when you’re ready to appreciate them without thinking of sex. He believes that marriage is okay when you are finally ready.
PART 1:
Gianni- How dating is experienced in my culture is that you meet the family members and you go on dates like going to the movies and so on. How marriage is experienced in my culture is by having kids children and arguing on a daily basis. People should start dating around 13 years old because anything younger than that is too young. Also, adults should get marry about 28 years old, at least, because anything younger i think you’re too immature to be committed like that.
Chanel- In my culture dating is a secret thing because my parents want me to marry a black, christian, boy. I think its appropriate to start dating when you feel comfortable, age doesn’t matter. I think people should get married when they’re happy; when they find that one person they want to sped their entire life with.
Christian- People expect me to marry in the same religion I am in, it doesn’t matter who i date. I think it’s good to start dating around 16 years old. I think it’s okay to marry someone when you’re in your 20’s and so is the other person.
Jonah- In my culture, i don’t really care. You can date whoever you want. I think you should start dating when you have your priorities straight because its a big dedication. I think you should marry someone no lower than 26 years old because i can’t stand people having kids at like 19 years old.
PART 3:
Anthropologists consider marriage to be universal because you can date whoever you want. People around the world, now a days, marry other people from different religions, races and so on, making the world universal and interracial.
I think monogamy is right and polygyny is wrong. I think everyone should be married to ONE person and ONE person only. You can only love one person at a time so you should only be married to one person.
I think you should get married when you feel like you love the person and you can see yourself staying with that person for your whole life.
Dating shapes how to be 16 because when you’re 16 you want to be free and do whatever you like, so you start dating people. Being in relationships is a major part of being 16 because it helps you mature through your life.
Part 1-
Christian- I feel that marriage is set by religion, and in my religion (Mormon/Church of the Latter Day Saints), it is suggested that we marry someone who is also mormon.
Sammy- In my religion, you are supposed to marry someone who is of the same religion. However, in my family, they don’t really care about who you marry, it’s more about finding someone who loves you. I feel that you should marry any age after 18.
Raymond- In my culture, they allow you to date/marry whoever you want, as long as you truly love that person.
Faith- I feel like when you’re ready to commit t marriage, you should do it, and I think that there is no appropriate age to start.
Part 2
Anthropologists consider marriage to be universal because it is “a culturally sanctioned union between two or more people that establishes certain rights and obligations between the people, between them and their children, and between them and their in-laws.”. Therefore, even though the common perception of marriage in this country is a loving bond between a male and female and events such as same sex marriage are shunned and considered improper, anthropologists have a broader view of marriage that encompasses all forms of bonds in all cultures.
Personally, I feel that polygyny isn’t morally right. I feel that a man and woman should only have a special bond with one another, and neither partner should be engaged in sexual relations with other people. I think dating is a staple of being sixteen. It gives you a taste of what you will be most likely entering within the next couple of years (marriage).
Sammy
1. In his culture there is something called a “hoppa” which is basically a table cloth that four people carry around. They aslo shatter a wine glass to show marriage is fragile.
2.He believes the appropriate age to start dating is 14-16 because 11,12,13 still resemble childness and immaturity.
3. He believes the age appropriate to get married is 18 and above because you are legal to society.
Alize
1. Her mother dissaproves with dating. She beileves shes to young and not emotionally ready. Her mother believes boys are all dogs.
2.She believes the appopriate age to start dating is whenever you are ready for commitment.
3.She believes the appropriate age to get married is 26-ish.
Chanel
1.Chanel believes dating is personal. Her family is to judgemental.
2.She believes the appropriate time to start dating is when you are emotionally ready however, when you are young you might not be mature enough.
3.She stands by the quote “Home is where the heart is” When YOU feel youre ready to wed.
Francis
1.He believes dating is for teens because youre a little young,not to old and not to young.
2.He believes the appropriate age to start dating is anyone who can marry whoever they want,personally believes the late 20s.
3.He believes the appropriate age to get married is when two people are truly in love and are willing to be commited.
Carina
1.She doesnt have a culture. She can wed whoever she pleases.
2. She believes the appropriate time to start dating is when you are in highschool.
3.She believes the appropriate time to get married is whenever you are ready and young. Preferably early 20s.
How is dating and marriage lived/experienced in your culture?
-Somthing secret. Judged based on religion/skin color.
-Parents want a christian guy
-Parents think their kids are too young. not emotionally ready.
-Up to me
At what age do you think it is appropriate to start dating?
-When they feel ready and things are not complicated
-16
-When you are ready to be commited and be serious about it
-A teenager
At what age should people get married?
-When they find the one
-26-ish
-21
-No specific age. When your ready.
Anthropologists consider marriage to be universal because it is somthing that heppend worldwide everyday. Some weddings take form of a competition for example the Massai warriors The idea of the game is whichever male jumps the highest is eligble to get married. they are judging eachother to find out who is the most eligible of marrage. In a way its another form or what americans do.
Marriage should be an open oppritunity for everyone. I agree with Monogamy it shows commitment,loyalty as ell as trust between the people that are married. I don’t nesicerily disagree with Polygyny which is marriage to more than one wife. Even though its shows a lack of commitment in same ways, someone could feel love for more than one person and this is a way for them to show that. Dating shapes what it means to be 16 because its a stepping stone to adulthood. Its the first step to a relationship and what it means to be in love.
1. Christian-He believes that him being Mormon shapes his dating/marriage because he wants to be married to someone of the same culture even though he doesn’t have to be. He thinks it’s ok to start dating at 16 but to get married whenever he wants.
Ashley-Her parents think she shouldn’t start dating until she’s older but she thinks people should start dating as a teenager. She also thinks people shouldn’t get married until at least their mid-twenties.
Katya-Her parents don’t care who she’s dating/marrying as long as her boyfriend/husband isn’t abusive or a drug addict. She said people should start dating when they feel emotionally ready and should get married when they’ve been in a steady relationship for a while.
Faith-She said that in America people usually start dating around college but she thinks its ok to date when you feel ready to be faithful to one person. She also said there’s not a certain age you should get married it should just be when you’re sure/ready.
3. Anthropologists consider marriage to be universal because every culture has some form of marriage even though they can vary a lot from each other. The universal definition of marriage is that it is “a social union or legal contract between two people.” The only part of it I wasn’t sure was accurate was that it’s only between two people because this might not be true in polygynous cultures, but in even those cultures the man only gets married to one woman at a time. I think that my views on polygynous vs. monogamous have been completely influenced by my cultural views and what my parents think, so I’ve never completely understood how girls are ok with being polygynous. I’ve always looked at it with some level of respect, but also with shock and a little bit of disgust.
I think that dating shapes what it is to be sixteen mostly because it’s another way of showing that you’re more mature. At least now, dating has become a type of segway between being a child and being an adult because it’s one of your first public decisions that your parents usually have very little or no say in it. This isn’t at all true for all cultures, but, from what I’ve seen, it usually is with people I know. In cultures with arranged marriages dating seems to be less of an accepted part of the society because the person doesn’t have the final say in it, their parents do. Arranged marriages also usually happen when at least the girl is younger, so there’s less of a time that people would date or want to date.
1. How is dating and marriage lived/experienced in your culture?
Kirk: Marriage should be between a man and a women.
Faith: Get married whenever you want.
Sammy: Traditionally, you should marry someone of the same religion.
2. At what age do you think it is appropriate to start dating?
Kirk: 13-16
Faith: Whatever age you feel you have a connection with someone.
Sammy: 13
3. At what age should people get married?
Kirk:20’s
Faith:Whatever age you want
Sammy:18
Anthropologist consider
Part One: How is dating and marriage lived/experienced in your culture? At what age do you think it is appropriate to start dating? At what age should people get married?
Gianni- Age 13 is appropriate to start dating. I think people should get married at age 28.
Tori- Dating is dumb, and boys are annoying and selfish, and they will hurt you. Whenever you are ready to get married is appropriate.
Dylan- Whenever I date, it’s my choice when I’m ready and my parents can’t decide that for me.
Ycell- I think that 13 is an appropriate age to start dating. In terms of marriage, I think ages 25-30 would be fine.
Jonah- Dating is appropriate when you have your life together (academics). I think you should get married at at least 30 years old.
Part Three: The anthropologists think that marriage is universal because people get married all around the world in different cultures, but it usually means something different compared to other cultures. Same sex marriage is not accepted everywhere as much as opposite-sex marriage which is more common. I totally agree with monogamy because I feel like one man should have one wife or spouse, and vice-versa for a woman. I think that it’s wrong to have more than one person to be attached to in a relationship. Maybe that’s because it’s what I’ve been taught to believe as I’ve grown up or maybe it’s just my own personal opinion. So yeah, I’m against polygnmy because I think it’s just wrong.
I think that dating shapes what it means to be sixteen because teenagers begin to date around the age of sixteen. Sometimes it doesn’t work out well because they aren’t necessarily looking for love, they just want somebody to be with. I don’t necessarily think that there should be a certain age that you should start dating, I think that you should start dating when you feel like you’re ready and you feel like you can be fully committed to that one person that you want to be with.
Ashley Guevara
Part one:
How is dating and marriage lived/experienced in your culture?
Francis: Marriage is mainly based on love, it shouldn’t be forced. Dating is accepted mostly depending on the age.
Dylan: In my family, its mainly up to me when I decide I want to start dating/get married, my parents don’t really dictate it.
CC: I believe dating is pretty much just hanging out at more of an intimate level. I also believe marriage is kind of pointless, you don’t need to be married to prove how much you’re in love with a person, I feel like the way two people are around each other speaks for itself. In my parents eyes though, they think marriage is a way of proving love. I don’t know some people are more into the idea of marriage because the actual wedding its thought out to be extremely glamorized.
At what age do you think it’s appropriate to start dating?
Francis: Teenage years.
Dylan: Whenever you feel ready
CC: When you’re mature enough.
At what age do you think people should get married?
Francis: Whenever they feel like it.
Dylan: Again, whenever you feel ready, as long as it’s not too young.
CC: When they’re mature/ready enough to understand the commitment of marriage, etc.
Part three:
Anthropologist consider marriage to be universal because anthropologists believe “attracting lovers is the first step toward/attracting/entering the adult world”. The way some people see marriage is different than the way other people see would see it. Some people believe marriage is a form of commitment, a form of proving your love to someone while others get married solely based on either the benefits of marriage, or the glamour of the actual wedding.
My views on monogamy are that it’s normal, its what Im used to seeing and when it comes to polygyny I consider it to be pretty out of the ordinary compared to what Im usually used to. I feel like marriage is a form commitment, I honestly feel like its somewhat unnecessary. As I said before, I feel like most people get married mostly because of how “glamorized” the idea of an actual wedding is, or because of the benefits of marriage. Other than that there really isn’t much of a point in my eyes of marriage. I feel like dating shapes what it means to be 16 because of the fact you’re just learning what you look for in a partner, because you’re finally beginning to take the whole relationship thing seriously.
Raymond:Doesnt matter who date or marry, either black/ white or anything, you should marry when you feel comfortable with that person. Doesnt matter what age you should date
Dennis: Well first, there is connection of the male and female and have a love and then get married. Later they have a family when they feel ready.
Sammy: In his culture they want you to stay in your religion, just dont get pulled out from religion. Start dating at your teens because you know who you are. You should be married at age 18.
Tori: We date because of social life in television and we want to experience it ourselves. You should start dating when you are emotionally stable.
Channel: Dating in life is a secrete, the culture wants you to be a tall, good-looking man. you should start dating when your emotional ready. You should get married when you feel ready with that person, “when you feel like home with that person.”
Anthropologist consider married to be universal because when living in life there are people that want to have a relationship with another person. Naturally, people want to be emotionally attach to others and maybe want to spend with them for the rest of their lives with them.
My views of monogamy is when one person has another partner and want to stay connected with that person. My view polygamy is trying to spread the family name and that gives a reason that a man want to have many wives and i think is very hard to deal with the many children they will have. Marriage for me, is having a very “tight” relationship with another, wanting to be with that person and your want to be with you. I see many times: divorces, fights, and marriage should be the one you, your self, want to be with. This relates to 16 because now is a time that there are people to spend time with the opposite/same sex and teens are searching the ones they want to be with, and will give an idea of who to be with when they reach adulthood.
Interviews:
Jonah thinks that dating when your young doesnt make sense unless your grades and social life are in tact.
‘Whenever your like focused on work and your schoolwork and extra cirrcular activities together’ Jonah thinks that the appropriate ago to get marrie dis at least thirty, he thinks its stupid to get married young.
Tori thinks that boys are annoying, ‘they are too selfish to date anyone espcially as a teen. dating is dumb as f*ck keep things open cause it’s going to end’
Tori says you should marry when your actually ready, don’t jump into something your nto ready for.
Kirk thinks you should start dtaing between ages 12-16 ‘I guess your figuring out who you are and who you want or could be with. Kirk thinks marriage is based on when your ready no matter the age or time.
Gianni says you could start dating at the age of 13 since your ‘starting to mature and figure out who you are a little bit’ Gianni feels that marriage sould be when you find that person that makes you feel secure but mostly when your financially secure and dont need anyone to depend on.
I think marriage could be seen as universal because the same concept applies but on difernt levels to differnt people. In various cultures marrage is a bond of love but in some its a essity for religious or social reasons. I think marriage should be the union of two souls that are devoted to one another and everyhting that means love. Love has no boundries and should be limited because of sex, race or anything. Love is love. I can agree with monogomy on some levels but polygny is wrong, how could you love several people at once? or is it even love? I think love can’t be didvided between several people.
Dating at sixteen shapes your maturity levels, it’sard becuase we’re still young and selfish and have things to learn but mostly becuase we’re not sure of ourselves. At sixteen i think your at the agewhere you can decide who you should spend your time on and relationships only last so long so deote your time to your grades and yourself first before putting someone else before you. To me we can’t know what love if we’re so young.
Part 1:
Raymond: Raymond’s relationship with his family with his parents is a very open one when it comes to dating, but they don’t want him to have sex until he’s ready to take care of a kid (according to him that’s no time soon). He believes that there is no age limit when it comes to starting to date as long as you go with your following your heart. When it comes to marriage he believes you should be at least 25 because anything under that means that you could possibly not be ready.
Katya: In Katya’s life she and her parents don’t talk about dating as long as she’s in a safe relationship that doesn’t involve drug use and/or abuse of any kind. She believes that you should begin to date when you are emotionally ready because age does not effect your maturity… your emotions do. You should get married according to Katya when you are in a steady relationship and if that is the next step to go about.
Evelyn: Evelyn’s parents are Christian, but she is not. They have no problem with who she loves as long as she does not marry a Jewish person. You should begin dating in her eyes when you are 16 because it is one of many stepping stones into adulthood. And you should be aloud to get married at 21 because you are technically a legal citizen who is open to more opportunities.
Tori: Tori believes that in her culture people begin to date one another because of t.v. They see that as away to experience “life” which ends up leading to heartbreak. Tori says you should begin to date when you are ready to put another person’s needs before your own. When it comes to marriage you should be old enough to make smart decisions and deal with the consequences if it were to end.
Sammy: Sammy’s culture believes that he should try to stay within his religion and faith, but he should be with a person that cares for him and that he cares about. You start dating between the ages of 14-16 because you are a young adult. Between these ages are when you establish who you are and what you want. You should be able to get married at any point after 18 because “… You are an adult and should be able to decide whatever the ‘bleep’ you want.”
Part 3:
Marriage to anthropologists are considered universal because everyone does it. Cultures all around the world who have no relations to one another and are socially different have some type of marriage. People everywhere can view it differently from one another, but it still happens in all cultures. Its a union as well as a contract that some may use for economic opportunities and/or religious reasoning.
I think that monogamy is “normal” I guess because that what I’ve been raised to know, but Sammy brought up a good point when he said you can’t really be “monogamous” with cheating becoming a social norm. Polygamy is becoming more of an alternative as well because it allows spouses to have an “open marriage”. Dating shapes you as a sixteen-year-old because this is the time when you are figuring out who you are and what path you would like to follow. It allows you to find out who is comfortable with you and vice versa.